Profitable Yard Sales. Literally.

Mom and I ventured out to some yard sales this morning, and goodness! We found the bargains! Among them: $0.50 pants, $0.25 vases, $1.00 hassock, $0.25 little girls' clothing for a friend and...

$1.50

Yes, I found another bag... a cute one with an unknown treasure inside.


$1.75 in change!

I got the bag for free, and even made a little bit! : )

Finale.

Another season of work came to a close this evening... They were some of the dearest people I have ever met, and I will miss seeing them so often. Yet, I am so excited to be moving on once again, climbing the ladder of learning so that I don't have to do the "dirty work" for the rest of my life. The good thing about this experience, though, is that I will have more appreciation for and (hopefully) greater sympathy towards my aides someday.

But, look at the time... of course, I'm energized now (purely adrenaline, though) and not feeling sleepy. However we've gotta do some shopping tomorrow, so I need to rest up! : )

A quote I read recently (loosely translated, as I remember it):

Not every day is good, but there is something good in every day.

Zoom Zoom.

You know those time when you try with all your might to slow your thoughts and wish upon all your luck that your mind would decide to take a break at least once in a while?

Nope. Midnight is not a fun time to have a racing brain. Perhaps a post will result later though.

Terribly many things, changes, thoughts and (wonderful) challenges in life at the moment.

Wind up to Wind down.

Only a very few short weeks until I, once again, make the trek to college.

This summer has absolutely flown by, although it's been greatly different. Work was "the same," but it also brought new challenges and new joys. The break from homework meant loads more time to read what I wanted to read. : ) But again, new discoveries, challenges, thought provokers. Changes in life opened up time to spend reaching out... on a small scale, but beyond my comfort zone.

I'm gearing myself up for the routine of school again, and even looking forward to some aspects of it... I generally like at least a small dose of routine. Although, I won't need much time in school to realize how much I miss the summer break!

There will probably be more thoughts in the next several days as I pack up my life, yet again.

My mind twirls and whirls all the time; there's hardly ever a moment's rest from thinking.

Traffic.

Sitting in traffic.

Almost 1 hour, only 2 miles.

Lots of thinking time.

Lots of thoughts to think.

Got humility?

This struck me this morning. A lesson, or rather a song, on humility. . . living like Jesus means learning to be humble.

This week has held several firsts, but yesterday's first was the hardest.

I didn't know what to say, what to talk about. It was easiest to just say hi and leave it at that. I wish I could have been humble enough to admit that, yes this is awkward, but also silly. I wish I would have been humble but not so shy or scared.

I failed at being humble enough to recognize that there is another person involved in this, probably with his own uncertainties and hurts.

There's reasons, there's excuses, but it's time for me to, once again, give this burden to Jesus and let Him hold it and take care of it.

Things will get worked out. I know they will. He is Gracious beyond my awkwardness, Loving beyond my shyness, and Faithful my lack of humility. One day it will make sense; one day it will bring Him glory.

Update needed?

I guess I should update on life, although it's been typical of life: unpredictable!

Some wacky bug hit me yesterday and cut a day's work short for some much needed rest and cold drinks... I haven't had a fever like that for a long time! Today I was feeling better, although not quite back to normal, so the day off was an added blessing.

I've finished another book and started on yet another one... somehow I'm running out of time to read an incredible amount of books. Hopefully vacation time later this summer will prove mightily fruitful in the reading realm.


It's July, already??


Only 45 days of summer left for me.


woweeeee.

The Floater.

The floater saves our lives while we're at work. Or rather, our sanity.


No such luck tonight.


No floater.

I Luff My Car.

35 MPG.


nuff said.

His Beauty. My Encouragement.

My mind and my spirit are tired. I would benefit from a cabin in the woods with a porch and a chair and some hot chocolate right about now. Sometimes I just feel like that little bug... so small and hanging on during an unexpected and unpredictable ride...


But, I am so grateful that Jesus has all the time in the world to lift us up. Yet He also creates, paints, and arranges to encourage us with His beauty...

Timely.

"Who is the man who reverently fears and worships the Lord? Him shall He teach in the way that he should choose. He himself shall dwell at ease."

Psalm 25:12-13 AMP




Jesus, please make this my reality tonight.

That Thing Called Love.

Love is handing your heart to someone and taking the risk that they will hand it back because they don’t want it. That’s why it’s such a crushing ache on the inside. We gave away a part of ourselves and it wasn’t wanted.

Love is a giving away of power. When we love, we give the other person the power in the relationship. They can do what they choose. They can do what they like with our love. They can reject it, they can accept it, they can step toward us in gratitude and appreciation.

Love is a giving away. When we love, we put ourselves out there, we expose ourselves, we allow ourselves to be vulnerable.

Love is giving up control. It’s surrendering the desire to control the other person. The two—love and controlling power over the other person—are mutually exclusive. If we are serious about loving someone, we have to surrender all of the desires within us to manipulate the relationship.

...

You don’t need a man by your side to validate you as a woman. You already are loved and valued. You’re good enough exactly as you are. Do you believe this? Because it’s true. You have limitless worth and value. If you embrace this truth, it will affect every area of life, especially your relationship with men.

You are worth dying for.

Your worth does not come from your body, your mind, your work, what you produce, what you put out, how much money you make. Your worth does not come from whether or not you have a man. Your worth does not come from whether or not men notice you. You have inestimable worth that comes from your creator.

You will continue to be tempted in a thousand different ways not to believe this. The temptation will be to go searching for your worth and validity from places other than your creator.

Especially from men.

But you don’t have to give yourself away to earn a man’s love. You’re better than that. You’re already loved.

When you give too much of yourself away too quickly, when you show too much skin, you’re not being true to yourself. When you dress to show us everything, then in some sense we have all shared in it, or at least been exposed to it. There is a mystery to you, infinite depth and endless complexity…

Your strength is a beautiful thing. And when you live in it, when you carry yourself with the honor and dignity that are yours, it forces the men around you to relate to you on more than just a flesh level.

You are worth dying for.

If you’re dating someone, what kind of a man is he? Does he demonstrate that he’s the kind of man who would die for you? What is his posture toward the world? Does he serve, or is he waiting to be served? Does he believe that he’s owed something, that he’s been shortchanged, that he’s gotten the short end of the stick, that life owes him something? Or is he out to see what he can give? Does he see himself as being here to make the world a better place?

These are big questions you need to ask yourself.

Take him to a family reunion. Do some sort of service project with him. See how he interacts with people he doesn’t like.

Does he have liquid agape running through his veins? …

Can you tell him anything? Is he safe? Can he be trusted?

Can you open up to him, allowing yourself to be vulnerable, knowing that he will protect, not exploit that vulnerability?

Are you opening up like a flower?

When you live in your true identity, when you find your worth and value in your creator, when you live “in Christ,” in who you really are, you force him to rethink what it means to be a man.


Sex God, Rob Bell

The Dog in My Life

I've got . . .

friends in...

low places...

p.s. kudos to mom for the idea! : )

Your Book is In.

The library called to say that one of my requested books was on hold, so now I am reading Amish Grace. I am thoroughly enjoying it; plus, it's helpful to read more about my neighbors especially when it comes to "explaining" their lifestyle and beliefs to people who ask me if I am Amish. Ha.

I recommend this book!! It's not difficult reading, but definitely thought-provoking!

Summer Update

Time for another update. However monotonous it may be.

Life continues to sail along, of course. Thankfully, I've been given many more hours of work than I was expecting at the beginning of the summer. It's still not the amount I'd prefer, but since it's about 4x as much as initially given, I am extremely grateful!

I am enjoying work a bit more than I did last year; probably because I'm not at the end of the summer yet. It's still challenging and frustrating at times, and my patience is constantly being stretched and grown. But, it is a nice change to feel like I know at least a bit more what is going on... more confidence in my own skills and abilities.

I realized today that one+ month of summer vacation has already vanished! I've been doing a lot more (fun!) reading than I accomplished during the school year. Although in the last week or two the reading has slowed, so I need to pick up the pace a bit. I've finished a few of the books on my ever-growing list, and am looking forward to reading more.

I am most definitely looking forward to finally enjoying a complete weekend off! I have worked the last three weekends, so it will be nice to relax and hang out with family... maybe a fire pit and smores some night???

That'll have to do for now.

Laugh Lines are the Good Kind of Wrinkles

*One note: I think this probably came as an attachment on an email or something. I'm not condoning all lifestyles or opinions, but thought the majority were worth a smile.

• If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
• Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
• If a pig losses its voice, is it disgruntled?
• If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
• When someone asks you "a penny for your thoughts?" and you "put your two cents in," what happens to the other penny? Or do you get change?
• Why is the person who invests all your money called a broker?
• Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
• Why are a wise man and wise guy opposites?
• Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
• Why isn't 11 pronounced "onety one"?
• "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? (again, sad...)
• If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
• If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
• Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
• What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
• I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older, then it dawned on me. They're cramming for their final exam.
• I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks. So I wonder, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
• Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they delivered the mail?
• If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
• You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
• No one ever says, "It's only a game," when their team is winning.
• Ever wonder what the speed of lighting would be if it didn't zigzag?
• Last night I played a blank tape at full volume. The mime next door went nuts.
• If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

And it's only the first 30 pages... !!

Today I started reading Choosing Against War by John D. Roth. I picked up the book a few months ago, but didn't actually get to reading much beyond the introduction. However, today I found myself making note after note after note. I'm certainly not far into the book, but I have a lot of appreciation for what Roth writes and how he writes it.

Here are snip-its that resonated . . .


"Chapter Four expands on one specific theme of the nonviolent power of the cross: humility. Far from encouraging a passive retreat from the world, humility seeks to embody the vulnerability of the cross in everyday human relations...In the end, Christian pacifism is not an argument to be won, or a tool for reaching ideal political outcomes, or even an airtight ethical system. It is simply a commitment to follow Jesus sincerely and completely, even if that path should lead to the cross."


Roth quoting from In His Steps by Charles M. Sheldon:
"A mysterious stranger, a tramp dressed in rags, disturbs the neatly ordered life of the parishoners of First Church by interrupting their singing one Sunday morning with a request for help. When the well-heeled members reject his plea, the tramp exclaims to the congregation, 'It seems to me there's an awful lot of trouble in the world that somehow wouldn't exist if all the people who sing such songs went and lived them out.'"


"God's love for the world, expressed most fully in Christ, is genuinely good news, defying all human comprehension. God's love is unmerited, given without condition and without demand that it be reciprocated. It is vulnerable, expressed in the form of a human being who renounced his own status, assumed the role of a servant, and willingly suffered humiliation, pain and death. It is irrational, granted as freely to enemies as it is to friends. It is empowering, enabling all those who experience it to also, in turn, share it fully with others. It is persistent, extended patiently and stubbornly to those who choose to reject it. "

Me thinks.

You know, when there isn't any homework to do, it's amazing how much "extra" time a day holds . . . I spend a lot of that time thinking. Just pondering what has been, what is and what will be: typical of anyone's ponderings I suppose, since that's really all there is. Reading interesting books, listening to music. Organizing or de-organizing. : ) Thinking, wondering. Reaching in, reaching out. Working, relaxing. Missing, enjoying.

It always proves to be interesting, this thing called life.

and it always seems to need this thing I'm learning called patience. I'm trying to be patient. I wonder where it will take me?

Facebook Status

I am reading, rebuilding CNA muscles, and wishing I didn't feel like I'm getting sick . . .

but, not quite punk enough to take meds yet.

Finally.

Finally a day off after 7 straight days of work. I know; it's a taste of the real world . . . but I have also realized how much I appreciate at least one day for rest, and I also find my patience shows wear after awhile. I'm glad for the change of pace from schoolwork to "regular" work, but it's still tiring, just a different kind of tiring.

My Thoughts to You

My thoughts from tonight's drive while listening to this song . . . Remember that you're being watched... you're a role model for them, even though they're only a few years old. And, even though life might not be so easy right now, even though it might not make much sense, they're still watching you, watching how you walk through life. So you don't know what's coming next, what to do, where to go . . . continue to show them that the important thing is faithfulness in following Jesus wherever you are at in the moment, even if the place or the job doesn't look to be "long-term."

Driving through town just my boy and me
With a happy meal in his booster seat
Knowing that he couldn't have the toy
Till his nuggets were gone
A green traffic light turned straight to red
I hit my brakes and mumbled under my breath
His fries went a flying and his orange drink covered his lap
Well then my four year old said a four letter word
That started with "s" and I was concerned
So I said son now now where did you learn to talk like that

[Chorus one]

He said I've been watching you dad, ain't that cool
I'm your buckaroo, I wanna be like you
And eat all my food and grow as tall as you are
We got cowboy boots and camo pants
Yeah we're just alike, hey ain't we dad
I wanna do everything you do
So I've been watching you

We got back home and I went to the barn
I bowed my head and I prayed real hard
Said Lord please help me help my stupid self
Then this side of bedtime later that night
Turning on my son's Scooby Doo nightlight
He crawled out of bed and he got down on his knees
He closed his little eyes, folded his little hands
And spoke to God like he was talking to a friend
And I said son now where'd you learn to pray like that

[Chorus two]

He said I've been watching you dad, ain't that cool
I'm your buckaroo, I wanna be like you
And eat all my food and grow as tall as you are
We like fixing things and holding mama's hand
Yeah we're just alike, hey ain't we dad
I wanna do everything you do
So I've been watching you

[Bridge]

With tears in my eyes I wrapped him in a hug
Said my little bear is growing up
He said but when I'm big I'll still know what to do

[Chorus three]

Cause I've been watching you dad, ain't that cool
I'm your buckaroo, I wanna be like you
And eat all my food and grow as tall as you are
By then I'll be as strong as superman
We'll be just alike, hey won't we dad
When I can do everything you do
Cause I've been watching you

~ Rodney Atkins


They admire you, and I do too.

After One Week

One week of summer down. And, probably my favorite week because most college students are just finishing their finals and high schoolers aren't free yet either, thus I feel privileged to be on vacation already. : )

What to do this summer? Well, it will be a different summer, that's for sure (see my other blog for more of that), but hopefully some fun-ness too! I'm planning on reading a lot and my list of books keeps growing. Here's a few of the sought-after titles:

• Irresistible Revolution (finished!)
  
• The Myth of a Christian Nation (working on it...)
  
• Choosing Against War
  
• Jesus for President
  
• Secret Message of Jesus
  
• Velvet Elvis
  
• Sex God
  
• Signs for the Journey
• Blue Like Jazz
  
• some other random books...

Of course, there's other things to do too, like:

- working on compiling more recipes in my album-of-family-favorites, i.e. my own cookbook instead of using mom's all the time.
- learning how to cook
- reaching out
- working through and moving on
- organization
- decoration plans (for next year's (hopefully) bigger dorm room)
- learning more about and growing in patience, grace
- maybe making cards

I'm sure other things will pop up too, but this is good for starters, good for filling in those gaps not occupied by work. Oh, and extra sleep is always lovely as well.

Familiarity

After an 8+ hour roadtrip . . .


Familiar sounds.

Home-cooked food.

Family.

Friends.

My bed.


I am excited and anxious, not knowing what this summer will hold . . . I'm sure it will be a good break, though---a good break before the exciting, but intense "storm" of two years of clinicals! Wow . . .

Extra Credit

In the last 2 days I got 32 points of extra credit in Stats . . . Not to mention the 1-3 extra credit points on each homework assignment up until that time!

That should help, shouldn't it?!! : )

Countdown Update!

• 8 days of Cedarville life left

• 4 days of finals left

• 2 days of classes left

Follow Up

Here are links to the articles I mentioned in my last blog post. I wanted to include them with that post, but they were not available on the internet at that time. If, for some reason, the links do not work, you can go to the homepage of Cedars (our university newspaper) at http://www.readcedars.com/

The articles should be included under the "Viewpoints" section of issue 10.

Weighing the Wages of War: Passing on Pacifism

Weighing the Wages of War: Rethinking the ROTC

The Defenses We Build

Yesterday, the school newspaper included two opinion-articles contrasting two views on war: pacifism and "passing on pacifism." Personally, I thought both sides, both articles were well written; however, one (I bet you can guess which one) gave way to an uprise of extreme offense on part of the ROTC members. To clarify, the article for pacifism basically (and bluntly) said that we need to get rid of the ROTC program for its role in allowing and promoting "just war." While I agreed with the author, and was glad to read such an article at this school, I could understand why the ROTC memebrs took such great offense, because the author was highly critical of the military and all recruitment programs. It is true that he showed absolutely no support for the people in those programs.

However, as I listened to ROTC students talk, in absolute outrage, about this article, I realized a completely ironic situation. Those of us supporting pacifism are criticized for verbalizing our opinions when we don't support the military; yet, the ROTC members absolutely tore the author's opinion to pieces saying that he had no idea what he was talking about, he was biased. It's cliche, but we are told to appreciate military servicemen and servicewomen because they purchase our right to speak freely . . . then can you let me voice my opinion? Can you listen while I share my thoughts, while the author of this article explains his perspective?

Hmmmm . . . they seemd to take offense that the author had not "done his research" properly, and yet, have they honestly talked to, honestly listened to someone who supports a pacifist position? Have they done their research?

Perhaps I'm biased too. . . Perhaps I am too relieved to see an article in support of what I believe in to look at the article from middle ground. However, it frustrates me that I barely breathe the words "peace" or "pacifism" before people jump down my throat and block out anything I have to say... even if it's something they've never heard before. This morning I watched an ROTC member angrily pass several copies of the article to her friends, telling them to read the poorly written, biased, offensive article (on pacifism) and then read the well-written, well-researched, non-biased article (justifying war). Did she forget this is an opinions page. . . ?

I do not deny that it is difficult for me to answer the difficult questions of what to do when widows and orphans are the victims of an injust government, what the government's role is in the world, and the ever popular what would have happened in WWII, if we hadn't invaded . . .

But, just war is a complete oxymoron. I have been baffled by the fact that recently several people in support of military action have stated this . . . yet, they still cling to and place their hope and trust in military service.

Don't get me wrong: I'm still processing, still thinking, still pondering the reasonings and justifications of different positions. But, it just seems that so many times people supporting peace are told to get their facts straight and listen to the other side . . . can you honestly listen to my side this time, without building your defense?

Warning: Random

I've decided that Ohio has bipolar weather. And, I do not like it.

The forecast for tomorrow is chilly and rainy, which conveniently impacts "Junior Jam" where the University invites little kids to come and run around outside under the supervision of college students. . . and hopefully learn a thing or two about God's love. I'm glad I'm just helping with lunch (which is inside and of short duration/easy workload).

However, it is favorably warm right now, which is wonderful.

I'm enjoying checking the stats counter I installed on my blog . . . the number listed is unique visitors, and I have access to the number of hits. It's pretty neat!

I still have this annoying cold. cough. gross throat feeling. It doesn't seem bad enough to take "Multi-Cold Symptom: Severe" medicine. I don't want to be knocked out for a week. And, no, I do not look like the picture I posted yesterday(?); it just made me laugh. Treatment equals lotsa liquids, lotsa hand sanitizer and lotsa sleep!

I guess I better watch out...

"Gummy Bears May Have Sidelined Rose"


Today a news article on AOL's homepage reports that a basketball player ate too many gummy bears and got a tummy ache . . . sounds like me with that 5 lb. bag of gummies at the beginning of the school year! : )

"Someone Using Your Room and Car"

I laughed for a while at this, so I thought I'd share it . . . My dad emailed me this evening:

"Someone asked if they could stay here and we said they could, and we also said if they needed a car for anything they could use yours. We sent some pictures of the person using them. Hope it was okay."


uhhhhh, sure... but who in the world????

The story:
I adopted the bear from a family member . . .
and it apparently is now renting my room and my car, until I get home.

PTL!

PTL for moderate motivation and good productivity!
: )



p.s. I agree . . . 23 days doesn't sound as long as six weeks!

p.p.s I don't know why the picture of a piano. I just liked it. Sweet memories of plunking away at Grandma's house. and wishing I had more time for photography right now. Hmph.

Say what?

Guess what??!



. . . 38 days left . . .

. . . 28 days of school . . .

. . . only 24 days of classes . . .

Run your car off the side of the road
Get stuck in a ditch way out in the middle of nowhere
Or get yourself in a bind lose the shirt off your back
Need a floor, need a couch, need a bus fare

This is where the rubber meets the road
This is where the cream is gonna rise
This is what you really didn't know
This is where the truth don't lie

{Chorus}
You find out who your friends are
Somebody's gonna drop everything
Run out and crank up their car
Hit the gas, get there fast
Never stop to think 'what's in it for me?' or 'it's way too far'
They just show on up with their big old heart
You find out who your friends are
Everybody wants to slap your back
wants to shake your handwhen you're up on top of that mountain
But let one of those rocks give way then you slide back down look up
and see who's around then

This ain't where the road comes to an end
This ain't where the bandwagon stops
This is just one of those times when
A lot of folks jump off

{Chorus}

When the water's high
When the weather's not so fair
When the well runs dry
Who's gonna be there?

{Chorus}

You find out who your friends are
(yeah, yeah)
You find out who your friends are
Run your car off the side of the road
Get stuck in a ditch way out in the middle of nowhere
(Well man, I've been there)
Or get yourself in a bind lose the shirt off your back
Need a floor, need a couch, need a bus fare
(Man, I've been there)

Man, I've been there
Oooh yeah.


Find Out Who Your Friends Are, Tracy Lawrence


This song seemed entirely appropriate and applicable in my life right now. During the last month and a half several friends continue to check in and reach out, even though they could have just returned to their normal routines. Thank you!

I Can Trust

Yes, I know that You have paved a path for me
Yes, I know that You see what I do and don't need
But when it comes to the deepest things
I have a hard time relinquishing control, letting go

God it hurts to give You what I must lay down
But when I let go freedom's found
God it hurts to give You what I've held so dear
Because of Your love it's clear

I can trust You with this
I can trust You with me
I can trust You

Lord I know that You are worthy of my trust
And You have shown me time and time again
You're faithful and yet
I'm so scared of letting go of this
Afraid of what You might do with it
How could I forget who you are like this?

Me forsaking, heart is breaking
I let go of what I've held so tight
Freedom's mine now, for the taking
I move in faith, and not by sight
Let Your will be done


~ Rebecca St. James

Blessings overflowing . . .

An extra day at home due to a big 'ol blizzard!

The snow is already melting---I can see the ground! (I'm tired of snow...ready for spring!)

unexpected, GOOD grades on all tests this semester!

worship music=lovely!

Only 10 days. . . till free ice at Ritas!

. . . oh, and only 10 days till another break! : )

home sweet home

home sweet home.




only such a thing could help at certain times in life.

Less than 24 hours till Break!!!

And so much to do before then . . .

- nursing group poster presentation
- workout
- laundry
- (humerous) birthday card for a friend's birthday dinner tonight (hahahaha)
- student org application
- case study write-up
- !PACK!
- hopefully get some sleep at some point...

1.5 hours outside

+

226 pictures

+

snowy winter

=

hands too cold to post any of the cool pictures!

: )

Until

Is it unfair to say that You are leading,
Then try and face this mountain on my own,
Why am I scared, I've never stopped believing,
And You never left me alone.
Well, I can get ahead of where you've led me to,
But I will trust Your heart enough to wait for You ...

Until this mountain moves, 
Until the path is clear, 
Until Your voice is the only one I can hear. 
Until I see Your hand, 
Until I know Your heart, 
Until I trust the grace that's carried me this far 
I will be still, until ... 

How could I have never seen this coming,
It's not like I've been running from Your will,
Tell me why each day's another mystery,
Waiting for Your truth to be revealed,
I try to tell my heart to trust what I believe,
And wait on You through all of my uncertainty ...

Until this mountain moves, 
Until the path is clear, 
Until Your voice is the only one I can hear. 
Until I see Your hand, 
Until I know Your heart, 
Until I trust the grace that's carried me this far 
I will be still, until ... 

Bridge:
Be still my heart of worry,
Be still my restless soul,
Be confident and certain,
Be still and know

Until this mountain moves, 
Until the path is clear, 
Until Your voice is the only one I can hear. 
Until I see Your hand, 
Until I know Your heart, 
Until I trust the grace that's carried me this far 
I will be still, until ... 
Oh, I will be still, until


Until, Mark Harris

He's Always Been Faithful

Great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me

Morning by morning I wake up to find
The power and comfort of Gods hand in mine
Season by season I watch Him, amazed
In awe of the mystery of His perfect ways

All I'm in need of, His hand will provide
He's always been faithful to me

I can't remember a trial or a pain
He did not recycle to bring me gain
I can't remember one single regret
In serving God only, and trusting His hand

All I'm in need of, His hand will provide
He's always been faithful to me

This is my anthem, this is my song
The theme of the stories Ive heard for so long
God has been faithful, He will be again
His loving compassion, it knows no end

All I'm in need of, His hand will provide
He's always been faithful, Hes always been faithful
He's always been faithful to me


~ Sara Groves

His Overflowing Blessings

Just to name a few blessings . . .

~ An encouraging, fun and challenging professor who continually blesses me by her desire to help us. She is fair: she does not hand out "easy" grades, so we don't lose our motivation . . . but she doesn't give us a seemingly impossible task, so we seem overwhelmed. Rather, we are motivated, but not overwhelmed, we have fun but we also learn incredible things.

~ The love and care so many people have shown over the last week. Yes, this time has not been easy per se; but He is forever faithful, and that has become so much more evident to me. The little notes, prayers and emails mean so much to me!

~ A Sunday-school class that is challenging, but enjoyable, deep but understandable!

~ A work-load that is bearable . . . even with a few moments of free time! : )

Like Isaac she’s a gift to me
But like Abraham I don’t have the eyes to see
Cause I’ve doubted my heart
A thousand times or so

Has my shepherd ever let me down before
You’ve asked me for everything I’ve wanted to be
Surrenderin’ doesn’t come natural to me
But as I let her go
I feel freedom fill my soul
As I realize that you are still in control

Because what it really comes down to is this
She was never really mine
But always His
He has let me taste a love that could forever grow

Do I really love her enough to let her go?
Do I really love you enough to let you go?

I humble myself before you now
Surrenderin’ all the what’s, the why’s and how’s
Afraid of what you’ll do
As I give her up to you
Oh please hold her, fill her, my sweet Sue

To the altar I come on bended knee
Afraid of what lies ahead
Please let me see
Father, I’ve come to sacrifice my son
Not my will but yours be done

Because what it really comes down to is this
She was never really mine
But always His
He has let me taste a love that could forever grow

Do I really love her enough to let her go?
Do I really love you enough to let you go?

Surrender Susan, Jon Abel


Even in the midst of life's challenges, I continue to be amazed at God's faithfulness and how He shows that to me, even through the words of one musician who "happened" to be here this weekend . . . The story Jon shared and the song he played could not have been more applicable . . .

Before the breaking of the first dawn
I had numbered all of your days
Before naming all of the millions of stars
I searched and knew all of your ways

Who are you
to question the great I AM
Who are you
to doubt my perfect plan,

Be still… be still… And calm your anxious heart
Be still… be still… and know that I am your God

I know your soul
And I’m holding you in my hands
Will you trust me
That I won’t let you fall
Let go of your pain, your fear
Give it all to me
I promise you this
I’ll be your all in all

Who are you
To question the great I AM
Who are you
To doubt my perfect plan

Be still… be still… and calm your anxious heart
Be still… be still… and know that I am your God



Be Still, Alle Pennell


. . . the special music in chapel this morning . . . along with the speaker, so meaningful. If you get the chance, listen to it online (visit Cedarville's website).

A much needed smile-producer

from my Bible-study leader . . .

Hold Me Jesus

Well, sometimes my life just don't make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small

So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It's so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart

So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

Surrender don't come natural to me
I'd rather fight You for something I don't really want
Than to take what You give that I need
And I've beat my head against so many walls
Now I'm falling down, I'm falling on my knees
And this Salvation Army band is playing this hymn
And Your grace rings out so deep
It makes my resistance seem so thin

I'm singing hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace


Rich Mullins

He Meets Me Where I Am

Seemingly ironic, but surely a "God-thing" that today I read our Bible study chapter on doubting. The following is the prayer at the end of the chapter, from the book "Lord, Change My Attitude" by James MacDonald (I highly recommend it!!)

Lord, I thank you today that You are a good and a faithful God. Oh, God, increase my faith! Give me this day and this week a greater capacity to trust you, to rest in Your promises. Lord, help me to see You related to the very circumstances I face. Might I see how all that comes our way and how we handle it is directly related to our willingness to rest in Your promises and walk closely with You. Grant that kind of victory to me. May this day be different because of what I've prayed and acknowledged before you in this moment. And I promise to give You thanks and praise and glory for Your care and compassion for my life. In Jesus' name I ask these things. Amen.

P.S. I guess I won't go to Australia.... they probably have bad days too! : )

Is this the beginnings of a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day???

. . . I wanted to stay in bed . . .

. . . My Mp3 player froze . . . completely . . .

. . . My mind is confused and whirling . . .

. . . I miss everything about home . . .

. . . it's a Monday . . .

I am absolutely loving my classes, especially since they are progessively more "nursing-y" : ) And, I am enjoying more free time (can you believe it?)!



But . . .

How can three weeks of classes go so fast, but three weeks of life go so slowly?

I miss so many people, so many conversations, so many things . . .

My New Baby : D

Today was like Christmas-in-January . . . I got my new pride and joy : )

1.5 years closer to being a nurse, and 1 step closer to looking like a nurse : )

Here it is:

And, a few more fun things . . .

Proverbs 30:8,9

Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.

Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, 'Who is the Lord?'
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.

Thank you

I just want to take a moment to say that I am so grateful for those who are older and wiser than me who are willing to share honest but loving wisdom with me as I navigate through this adventure called life.

Thank you to all of you.

Our New Do

Here are some pictures of our hall before . . .

. . . and after decorating!

Our God Saves

Hear the joyful sound of our offering
as your saints bow down
as your people sing
we will rise with you
lifted on your wings
and the world will see that

Our God saves
Our God saves
There is hope
in Your name

Mourning turns
to songs of praise
Our God saves
Our God saves


Paul Baloche

A friend read this story in her devotions yesterday, and it was insanely applicable for both of us... In the midst of saying goodbye and returning to school with a mixed bag of emotions, I am trying to remember to make the most of each moment instead of constantly wishing for the future. God has me here for a reason, and those at home are at home for a reason... Even though I might not prefer the circumstances, I can still look for His hand in each day and find ways to be a blessing to others.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A story is told of a king who went into his garden one morning, and found everything withered and dying. He asked the oak that stood near the gate what the trouble was. He found it was sick of life and determined to die because it was not tall and beautiful like the pine. The pine was all out of heart because it could not bear grapes, like the vine. The vine was going to throw its life away because it could not stand erect and have as fine of fruit as the peach tree. The geranium was fretting because it was not tall and fragrant like the lilac, and so on all through the garden. Coming to a heartsease, he found its bright face lifted as cheery as ever. "Well, heartsease, I'm glad, amidst all this discouragement, to find one brave little flower. You do not seem to be the least disheartened." "No, I am not of much account, but I thought that if you wanted an oak, or a pine, or a peach tree, or a lilac, you would have planted one; but as I knew you wanted a heartsease, I am determined to be the best little heartsease that I can."

Others may do a greater work, but you have your part to do; and no one in all God's heritage can do it so well as you. They who are God's without reserve, are in every state content; for they will only what He wills, and desire to do for Him whatever He desires them to do; they strip themselves of everything, and in this nakedness find all things restored a hundredfold.

Captivating Beauty

Beauty is, without question, the most essential and the most misunderstood of all of God's qualities--of all feminine qualities too. We know it has caused untold pain in the lives of women. But even there something is speaking. Why so much heartache over beauty? We don't ache over being geniuses, or fabulous hockey players. Women ache over the issue of beauty--they ache to be beautiful, to believe they are beautiful, and they worry over keeping it if ever they can find it...

A woman knows, down in her soul, that she longs to bring beauty to the world. She might be mistaken in how (something every woman struggles with), but she longs for a beauty to unveil. This is not just culture, or the need to "get a man." This is in her heart, part of her design.

Captivating, John and Stasi Eldredge

P.S. Ladies, if you haven't read Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge, buy it or borrow it from someone. I definitely recommend the 52 pages I've read so far!

Excitement . . .

How many good things can we take in before we burst with excitement?

: D

The BIG Red Book . . . and a cumulative exam

Buried under that red book and dozens and dozens of pages of power point notes . . .
Yup, gotta know all that . . . and be able to think critically about it . . .
And that's just one class . . .

Nursing will be a blessing . . .
nursing will be a blessing . . .
nursing will be a blessing . . .

: P

I think I can, I think I can . . .

Just an update because I don't know when I will have a chance to update for real. Ha.

FYI: homework, papers, and tests are my life for the next three weeks. Lovely.

?

: /

Fish Out of Water

Today was the Veteran's Day chapel at school. Needless to say, everything military-related "went against my grain" and I left the Jeremiah chapel feeling more convinced of the importance of peace . . . and more of a loner in the middle of a "God and Country" school. During the last few weeks, several people involved with the University made the statement, "God Bless America." On the contrary, I whole-heartedly agree with the bumper sticker that states, "God Bless the WHOLE World. NO Exceptions." But, should I barely breathe a word of disagreement with that statement, I would be labeled as unpatriotic . . . among more severe descriptions. Whatever makes us think that we are God's favorite? Since when did the Biblical meaning of blessing strictly mean lavish finances? . . . Or at least that is how we seem to define it. What about His other children in the world, who are satisfied with the "meager" (dare I say "meager" according to Christian American standards) blessings of enough food but not extra, a roof but not a 5,000-sq. ft. home, health but not cosmetic vanity. Not only are they satisfied, but they are genuinely joyful. When will we learn the importance of doing things for His glory and His kingdom, instead of seeking an earthly blessing or reward by the means of prosperity?

And while we make statements about the sanctity of life, the precious nature of life, and the importance of protecting life, why do we "kill people who kill people to show that killing people is wrong?" How can we say that life is precious, while in the next breath angrily murmur hateful sentiments towards someone who "wronged" us?

Don't get me wrong; I'm speaking as much to myself as to anyone else . . . actually, I'm merely venting my thought processes from today. I don't understand the entire position of peace. I don't know how to back up my beliefs beyond ignorantly accepting what I've grown up with; I don't understand how to defend my beliefs in the context of Romans 13; I don't know what would happen if America wouldn't have "intervened" in World War II. But, at the same time, have we given peace a chance?

Call me cynical, unpatriotic or ungrateful. I am certainly grateful for the freedom I experience each day, the freedoms that allow us to bring glory to His name. I understand the price American servicemen and women paid for our freedom. But, do we understand the price of orphaned children, disabled bodies, and destruction other nations face when we invade in the name of "justice bringing freedom?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

P.S. Feel free to leave suggestions of books, conversations, knowledge, experiences and the like that could help me to understand the peace position of the Anabaptist faith so that I may develop my "baby beliefs" without blindly accepting what I have been handed. If that makes sense.

If you think missing me is hard, then you should try missing you.

-Author Unknown

I am so ready for another break.

Or perhaps just a week unlike the last.

Surprise!

It's amazing how much excitement one email can bring . . . even when it only says:

"You have a BOX!!!!!!!!!!!"

Somehow, those words are like life-savers to a college student. Something unexpected----maybe something to eat instead of the cafeteria food??!!!!

Now, it's time to make your mouth water . . . Here is the box I got today:




A basket of goodies from Mrs. Field's . . .

• Double Fudge
• Butterscotch Blondie Fudge
• Toffee Fudge
• Triple chocolate cookies
• Semi-sweet chocolate without nuts cookies
• White chunk and macadamia nut cookies
• Oatmeal, raisin and walnut cookies
• 12 raspberry and blueberry mini-muffins

YUM!

Life

I'd appreciate prayer this week, as I have an intense and demanding schedule ahead of me. As a sophomore nursing major, life tends to be intense anyway. But, this week the demands are multiplied.

• Anatomy and Physiology Lab Practical (today) [update: Survivable; I'm glad it's over!]
• Nursing Medical Terminology Quiz (today) [update: went well!]
  
• Humanities Quiz (today) [update: went well!]
• Microbiology Lab Quiz (tomorrow . . . 40 pts is a large quiz!)
• Microbiology Exam (11/2)
  
• Anatomy and Physiology Exam (11/5)

Some things to look forward to though . . .

• Registering for spring-semester classes tomorrow!
  
• Advanced Clinical Physiology
  
• Nutrition
• Provider of Nursing Care 2
• Statistics
  
• Old Testament Literature (Bible-minor)
  
• Worldview Development (Bible-minor)
  
• A "reward for surviving" Chinese dinner out with some nursing friends on Friday evening. . . well, it's still in the works, but it's a possibility!
• Parents' weekend in two weeks!

Fall Break

A beautiful weekend, in so many ways!

(The picture does not do justice . . .
but, that waterfall was 94' high!)


. . . and, my favorite . . .


.10.20.07.

Only 50 hours . . .